Who am I : Profile

Ok who am I, this has been a strange one because it hinges on seeming narcissism but here we go, some of this comes from my life experience, other stuff like personality, psychology, and intelligence comes from the battery of testing I went through in my process to the priesthood. I've always felt I've been born during the wrong time I've been fascinated by the mind, and imagination my entire life. I've especially been intrigued by those things we don't know the answers to. I grew up believing adults knew the answers to everything, then I saw a show called in search of hosted by leonard nemoy many years ago, combine that with my interest in sci-fi and fantasy and I was hooked, especially by the early anime that could be stumbled upon back in the early 70's. I've studied the occult, science, majick, vampires, cryogenics, you name it. If it was on in search of, and they said people didn't know I wanted to. So the theory of everything, martial arts, chaos theory, genetics, as well as the occult, psionics became like a drug, any new field I came across I studied, until it was memorized then I'd move on to the next. I've lost track of the styles of martial arts I've studied, the different religions, the different philosophies and the diffrent weapons I've learned to use. My martial skills are a bit limited today, and I can't use many of the two handed weapons like I could before, but fencing, my sword forms, well the style has changed I've had to learn new more defensive styles because of my lack of movement but adapt or die right? Over the years friends have taught me to use midi to make music since playing the harp, or the keyboard is nearly impossible with the atrophy and spasms of my left side, and those and other friends have taught me to do graphic art, so I can add music and art to my writing and poetry. According to the testing my average IQ is 185, over 200 in some things, about 145 in others but things being relevant, math is not my friend, so much of my school now, for work is focused on math and the sciences as well as philosophy, and all the strange fields under its unwieldy auspices. My 3d spatial thinking is off the charts, and according to the tests the me you see, is the me I see, and for the most the same me under duress. Their are a few points of deviation on that test but I guess as much as psych tests can tell I am very much "what you see is what you get". For more about the whole personality - INTJ thing you can find it in another post. I had planned on going into the police force, but then the accident happened, that lead to a dark angry period in my life, I'm still trying to clean up the wreakege of that, I lost pretty much my whole family and all of my friends, which lead deeper into pain meds and hurtful actions, it wasn't until my arrogance led to me hitting rock bottom did I have my "conversion experience" and I realized much of what I was doing, and had done. I might tell that story at some point, I don't go there often. I made big changes after that which has led to me today, but seeing as this story leads to the first meeting between myself and my love that's going to be another post. So as I sit here surrounded by my library collected over a lifetime, lol with the collected works of more writers and subjects than is easily imagined, their are literally books in rows, stacked on top of each other, in the bed room, the library, the living room, even the bathroom has not only its shelves of books, but three cabinets of more books, the living room entertainment center even has a hidden pull out full of books I don't want people to know I have, like my star wars books, star trek books, Babylon five, even some movie adaptations like Titan A. E., Dungeons and Dragons, chronicles of riddick, and a lot more in this vein as well plus my Mercedes Leckey, Anne Bishop, Judy Blume, and other writers perceived by the book nazi's as books for girls. Anyway that's enough narcissism for now if I missed anything let me know, I'll be happy to update it.