As much as I have begun to enjoy this blog I've realized it's a tripod, very unstable, I write stories, poetry and art, which is one leg it stands on, I also stand on my soapbox and think out loud, most times not oping but just thinking, trying to determine how I feel about a subject, another leg. Lastly I talk about my life, what's going on, who I am, what I do, that sort of thing. This would be leg three.
I struggle constantly to balance the tripod having little input from the readers, if your a regular reader and come back, I wish I knew which you were coming back for. Or over 1000 hits, are you all just random readers who come once and never return? I wish I knew. I can't improve or add more of what you like if I don't know, are you trying to comment and can't as a few have said, I don't know how to improve things if I don't know where the problems are.
I am trying to go back and clean up old posts with the new format, but it has it's bugs still, I appreciate you reading and hope your enjoying what I'm offering. Forgive the latest short story, it was a first attempt in that style, but agian I hope it was still enjoyable, I may update it in time.
I just want to say I'd like to talk more about work, but everything I do is covered by a non-disclosure form, considering the topics were researching I understand why, but it makes talking about work, and school difficult at times. I also learned nobody wants to hear about your health problems, so I try to censor the stuff I don't think anyone is interested in, which sometimes clashes with my open and honest principle. I will always be open and 100% truthful in what I post.
Sometimes that's inconvenient because you might already know, my wife and I are not on best terms with her parents, as her mother is now on my FB, I'm guessing if she doesn't know about this blog she will, I'm still not censoring myself. My wife understands this is bigger than a school project now, and is willing to deal with blowback since they refuse to deal with me. They like to catch her alone when I'm not there, I know great parents, like I said I'm not filtering this for them, they've created this situation, if they want it fixed, well we haven't left the state yet, but that might not be far off. Actually just so you know I'm being fair, you know how little time my wife and I have, and how jealously we guard it, she has a vacation coming up we offered to stay a few days with them, if they wanted, to chill, chat and spend time with each other. We were going to go camping, just us time. Instead we're trying agian... I'm going into this pre-biased but open minded.
Guess you'll hear how it goes, it's still a few weeks away, but usually the shock waves are felt around the world. Don't worry you'll feel it when it happens. We're also going to the musical to see Les Mis, one of my favorite shows. As my wife has her degree in directing theater arts, she's also a big fan. I can't believe she's never seen this one, glad I get to take her. I'm looking forward/dreading the how we met post, being a sociopath makes relationships hard, on both of us, but I do love her, more than anything, I let my family including my little niece move a state away to be with her, after six years we've never fought, or raised our voices at each other, her unselfish giving makes me want to be a better person for her, the lesson there I think is if there's someone out there for a monster like me, there's someone for everyone, we used to joke shed smuggle iced soda waters to hell for me, but in truth she has well and truly saved my life and soul, thanks for reading everyone.
PS : I hope everyone finds there other half, until your complete and whole you don't know what your missing, knowing they know you, and all your baggage and love you unconditionally, that your truly safe and can let down your guard because they will never knowingly hurt you, science says this is a biological survival tool, I'm sure atheists have a similar thought, I just call it the greatest of gifts I'm truly unworthy of.
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